A Pilgrim's Journal

14 For sin shall not have dominion over you: for ye are not under the law, but under grace.

15 What then? shall we sin, because we are not under the law, but under grace? God forbid.

16 Know ye not, that to whom ye yield yourselves servants to obey, his servants ye are to whom ye obey; whether of sin unto death, or of obedience unto righteousness?

17 But God be thanked, that ye were the servants of sin, but ye have obeyed from the heart that form of doctrine which was delivered you.

18 Being then made free from sin, ye became the servants of righteousness.

Ever wonder what Paul was thinking when the same Jesus who healed the multitudes would not remove the thorn in his flesh?

Ever wonder what Paul was thinking when the same Jesus who calmed the storm later rescued him, and still allowed the shipwreck?

Ever wonder if Peter wished that Jesus had taught him about the temple tax before he promised to pay it, instead of after?

Or how about Sodom and Gomorrah? Ever wonder why they were punished so quickly when many others have had more time to repent?

Ever wonder if Elijah questioned why he was sent to a foreign widow's home instead of someone in his homeland?

I find that this is an easy aspect of Bible stories to overlook. Here we are, gaining such benefit and teaching, while reading about trials and seeming misfortune of others. And we are encouraged to trust in the same God that allowed them to go through these things, and indeed carried His people through those same situations.

Sometimes we even overlook the lesson. "Oh, that doubting Thomas," we say, only later to realize that his doubt added evidence for us to believe. "Oh, that sign-seeking Gideon," we say, only later to realize that even asking for a sign is a pretty bold act in itself.

The trials that we are going through may make no sense to us right now. We probably won't see the full implications. But I think we also need to be open to the idea that God can use our life to teach lessons to someone else. He might not deliver us right away, and it may be that His reason is to help save another person down the road, who hears our story, and who we may never meet in this life.

It's not just about us.

I was surfing YouTube tonight, reading articles and watching interesting videos by more fundamentalist preachers, and came across this Q&A video of John Piper. You can watch it here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=enkIK6Wqqdk

I found it very interesting in the videos that I watched, how he tended to highlight Biblical aspects in his answers that were not always immediately apparent. And in this video, he covers 3 areas of concern when it comes to children: the moral aspect of birth control methods, the Kingdom aspect of the number of children a couple might have, and the call of raising Christian children in a world where some people think overpopulation is a large concern.

Be glad in the LORD, and rejoice, ye righteous: and shout for joy, all [ye that are] upright in heart.

Note: sometimes I use creative writing as an emotional steam cleaning. It often helps cheer me up afterward. This is one of those times. Read the story with a grain of salt.

People wondered. He was always just a little bit off the beaten path. It was easier for him that way, but it sure made life hard in the end.

Most people got it in the winter. It might affect him then, but usually he was too busy for things to drag him down too low. No, winter was his up time.

The hard part was summer.

Lorne settled into his office chair and stared at the stack of papers he had to fill out. It was a good thing he had taken copious notes over the past six months undercover. Just too many details to keep track. And the brass wanted a detailed report of the entire operation.

There were regular interruptions from the guys passing by his office, and this didn't help him get any further on the paperwork. They were all happy to see him back. For that matter, he was happy to be back! He had been in some pretty tight spots this season. It was nice to relax again and see some friendly faces. Faces that could be trusted.

Trusted. Sometimes he wondered if the underworld had more of a sense of community than the straights. There had to be at least 50 guys stopping by his door over the past week. Some shaking his hand so hard his arm nearly came out of the socket. Some with hardy back slaps and truly warm grins.

But they were gone within five minutes without fail. Of course. They had work to do. Places to be. Perps to catch. Brass to polish.

Lorne didn't hold it against any of them. He'd do the same thing in their shoes, and had done it. But after three years in the undercover division, he could see the direction this was going, and he wasn't sure he was up to the challenge.

It took a certain breed to do undercover work. It helped if you had few ties. No family. Few friends. No kids. He was paid well for the work. Nobody wanted to do it. Well, almost nobody. He nearly did it for free. It energized him. It made him feel alive. Connected. The risk never seemed to enter his mind, and so far, the risks had never materialized in his world either.

That might not last.

He was okay with that. It was part of the job. Part of the call. Besides, if the job asked that much of him, who was he to refuse? Nobody else asked.

Lorne swivelled in his chair and looked out the window at the beautiful sunny day outside. The warmth soaked into him. It almost warmed his heart. A smile even spread across his face. Most of the work for past six months was in the dark. Undercover work was not a daylight profession. Just seeing the sun was a treat.

A sunlight of its own did exist, though. It was a different kind of trust. Police could work in the daylight. The underworld could not. And with that level of secrecy, there was a matching level of camaraderie that fueled the work. The worse things got, the better it felt. The smaller the loopholes, the tighter the knit.

Lorne couldn't deny it to himself, in his more honest moments. And he knew this was a dangerous sign. He should probably open up to the company shrink. He did, to some extent. But it scared him to even admit to himself how much of a brotherly bond there was between him and the crime boss he had just turned in. The feeling was there alright. Lorne missed him.

Not the crime. No, that was mostly disgusting.

The dark sunlight.

Yeah, that was it. A warmth from the very people who would kill him to preserve their own scrap of heat. A red flame of humanity flickering among the dried logs of crime he was there to erase.

Now that it was gone, the rest of the world seemed empty. Bright, yes. Sunny, yes. Friendly, yes. Easy, definitely. But he could hardly find that spark to get the old engine running in the morning.

It was probably exhaustion. It was time to get reacquainted with normal life. With daylight. It would take time. No need to push it. But in the meantime, the drag was there. The tank was empty.

Welcome to summer, boys.

A cherished tune from the Gospel Echoes album "We'll Shake Hands".

   Key of D, 3/4 time

        D        G        D
   In a world of fear and turmoil
                                   A
   In a race that seems so hard to run
           D        G      D
   Lord, I need Thy rich infilling
        A               D
   Even so, Lord Jesus, come!


   (Chorus)
        D        G      D
   Even so, Lord Jesus, come!
      A                   D
   My heart doth long for Thee
                          G            D
   Though I've failed and betrayed Thy trust, Lord
        A             D
   Even so, my Jesus, come!


   (musical)


           D          G         D
   When my eyes shall span that river
                               A
   When I gaze into the vast unknown
         D        G       D
   May I say with calm assurance
         A                D
   "Even now, Lord Jesus, come!"

   (repeat chorus)

        A               D
   Even so, Lord Jesus, come!

I read Joshua 17 tonight, and near the end of that chapter (NIV), there is the story of the tribe of Joseph (which is made up of Ephraim and Manassah) and how they wanted more land.

Joseph was a big tribe. Very fruitful. And apparently, the land they got was not big enough for them, in their own eyes. So they complained to Joshua.

But from the sound of their request and/or complaint, it sounds like they wanted more land, and wanted it just given to them. And Joshua gives them the same answer, twice, but in different tones. The first time it is a slightly chiding suggestion. The second time it is a fatherly command, with the assurance of success if they would just believe and obey. But the message was the same:

You're certainly strong enough. So, if you really want it, go get it!

It's easy to expect things to be handed to us when things have been going well... so well that we now have a lot to lose if things went bad.

But if our blessings mean we need even more blessings (a wonderful state to be in!), it's time to get out the axe and start clearing some new land.

This is a message for me. I'm big. I've been blessed. When it comes to even more blessings, it's time to get out my axe and "Go Get It!"

In my previous post, I mentioned that I love the law "eye for an eye, and tooth for a tooth." This may have puzzled a few people, and so I will attempt to explain my hope with a story.

Please keep in mind that this is only as far as I understand the law. I may be wrong in the details, and I encourage you to double check the Bible and correct me, preferrably with scripture, if I'm wrong.

Imagine for a moment that you are a rich judge, who loves equality and justice.

One day, two men come before your bench, and they are obviously angry with each other. One man is missing a tooth.

The man without the tooth holds up a video tape, and submits it as evidence, along with a number of witnesses. When you watch the video, you see clearly how the one man punches the other in the mouth for no apparent reason, and a tooth flies out.

You question the witnesses rigorously, and confirm that these two men are perfect strangers, and the puncher has an anger management issue and decided to take out his frustrations on the closest victim.

After hearing all the evidence, you clearly see that the one man is in the wrong, and the other is in the right. You feel some justice coming on! You feel righteous indignation in your belly! You are just about to open your mouth and pronounce the verdict when the strangest thing happens.

These two men start to argue right in front of you. Their voices get louder and louder, and soon the toothless man takes a swing at the offender. You personally hear the crack of a tooth, and the soft skittering sound it makes as it slides across the hardwood floor of the courtroom.

Your shoulders sag. Your work here is done. They have taken matters into their own hands, and justice is finished. There's no more you can do here, so you bang your gavel and yell, "Next!" The men slink away, somewhat embarrassed.

The next case is surprisingly the same. There was a fight, one man was blinded in one eye, there's a video showing the evidence, the case is crystal clear.

You start to feel that familiar feeling in your belly again. Justice is about to be served! Woe to the man who breaks the law and comes before you unrepentant! Just as you are about to open your mouth to pronounce the verdict, an even stranger thing happens.

The offender hangs his head and asks for permission to speak. You grant it, and he says, "Your Honour, I know I have done wrong, and will pay the debt, whatever you decide. I am very sorry for my behaviour. There is no excuse."

You take his statement into consideration. He is now repentant, so your wrath is now abated. But the injustice still stands, and the victim's eye still does not work. Justice must be served.

Then the man with the patch over one eye asks for permission to speak. You grant it, and he says, "Your Honour, I know this man is in the wrong, and he has damaged my eye, but I also know he is a poor man, and cannot possibly repay me. So I forgive him the debt, and claim no damages. Please do whatever you think is right."

Now you smile. This hardly ever happens. But it is as if the entire courtroom lights up with a heavenly light.

You examine the case again. The man was clearly in the wrong for having damaged his neighbour's eye. But the neighbour has forgiven him! Therefore, there is nothing you can do to the offender. Yet there is still an injustice. The man is still without a working eye. Since you can't punish the offender, there is only one avenue of justice left.

You reward the victim.

Since you're a rich judge, you pay for the treatment yourself. You add extra for pain and suffering, and for any lost work that was incurred because of the incident. The men leave, both very happy.

This is why I love this law. For I believe that if the law works in one direction, that is, in the direction of death, then I believe it should also work in the other direction, the direction of life.

We, as men, see this law, and start breaking teeth out of the offender, since that is all we can do. But God can look at this law with the bountiful riches of His grace, and restore what was broken.

Indeed, if the other laws are anything to go by, where the offender is ordered to pay double or even 4 times the amount stolen, then perhaps God will even restore double the teeth, and double the eyes, to His children who have suffered wrong.

And what will such children do with an extra tooth? Why, give it back to God, and to someone else who may need it.

Over and over we are told in the Bible that God loves justice and righteousness. Over and over we are given examples that God is a very careful accountant, and keeps things equal in His dealings with man. And over and over we are told that God expects the same of us.

So that's how I view the "eye for an eye" law. It is a law of equality. A law of justice. If a wrong has been committed, it needs to be made right. As men, we can either take matters into our own hands, and effect justice in this life, with human methods. Or we can do good to the offender with the view that God will reward us later with even better riches.

But either way, we can be sure that God will make things equal and just in the end.

I've been down with a cough and cold lately, and while recovering and resting, I have found some time to read and study.

I've been studying various aspects of the Sermon on the Mount, found in Matthew chapters 5, 6, and 7. I've been wrestling with the idea of non-resistance, or in the words of Tolstoy: "non-resistance of evil by force."

I'm not sure I agree with everything Tolstoy writes, but one thing I have found insightful: when resisting evil using force, we are returning evil for evil.

It's that Old Testament law coming into play again. An eye for an eye. A tooth for a tooth. And while I love that law for heavenly reasons (I'll have to explain that later), when it comes to the Law, it is hard for people to look at the Old Testament and the New Testament and see the same God at work.

In some cases, "eye for an eye" seems harsh. Can't we all just get along? Can't we show each other some mercy? Can't we rehabilitate the poor law breaker? This all sounds so uplifting and enlightened, and we happily nod our heads in agreement with the New Testament.

That is, until we are wronged personally. Then we want justice! How dare my neighbour steal my car! How dare he trespass on my property! How dare he knock out my tooth! Knock out his in return! It's only fair! I want justice, man!

In these cases we nod in agreement with the wisdom of the Old Testament. Justice is a good thing. God was right all along. We can't just let the wicked run free. And so goes the logic.

And so we are confronted, whether consciously or not, with the crux of the matter. It is a choice Adam made in the garden of Eden. And it is a choice we make every day.

When God first created the garden of Eden, everything was good. He called it very good.* What is interesting to note, is that this included the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil.

The Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil was good.

This is confirmed by the verses afterward, where God says:

	And the LORD God said, Behold, the man is become as one of us,
	to know good and evil:
	   Genesis 3:22a

So simply the knowledge of good and evil can't be evil if God also knows it.

So what was the problem?

The problem was eating its fruit. The problem was living on that knowledge. Living on the basis of the Knowledge of Good and Evil results in death.

In my mind, this resolves perfectly the apparent difference we see in God in the Old and New Testaments. For God was just giving us what we asked for. And woe to us when God gives us what we ask for, against His command for good.

So God setup a nation in the kingdom of earth, called Israel, and gave that nation a righteous law. He began by being the King for that nation, but the nation rejected Him as King, and so He gave them a human king, just as they asked for.

And the righteous law used evil against evil, to achieve justice.

The problem is that God had already told us that this would kill us. He told us this way back in the garden of Eden. The Law cannot save us, no matter how righteous it is, no matter how good it is. It cannot save us because we are living on the fruit of the Knowledge of Good and Evil. When someone does evil, we do evil in return in order to "make it right." In order to balance the scales.

It is a race to the bottom. It is a race toward death.

So when Jesus comes along, declaring the Kingdom of Heaven, and preaches His Sermon on the Mount, He is basically asking us if we've had enough yet. And when I read His sermon, I notice something striking, which I should have noticed a long time ago.

He is preaching a Heavenly Law, for a Heavenly Kingdom, ruled by a Heavenly God, for a Heavenly People.

And nowhere, in the entire sermon, are we told to return evil for evil. In fact, we are told to "resist not evil." Just like Paul writes in Romans 12:

	17 Recompense to no man evil for evil. Provide things honest in
	the sight of all men.
   
	18 If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably
	with all men.
   
	19 Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but [rather] give place
	unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance [is] mine; I will repay,
	saith the Lord. [Deut. 32.35]
   
	20 Therefore if thine enemy hunger, feed him; if he thirst,
	give him drink: for in so doing thou shalt heap coals of fire
	on his head. [Prov. 25.21, 22]
   
	21 Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good.
   
	   Romans 12

This is the Heavenly Law! And there is not a trace of evil in it. The only weapon we have against evil is good! This is the restoration of creation, before the Fall. This is the heavenly life.

So when people scratch their heads, and wonder why it seems like God had a personality change between the Old and New Testaments, point back to creation. It is us that needs the personality change. God is right all along. And to prove it to us, sometimes He gives us exactly what we ask for. But even then, He is able to work things out to our good.

	3 And the devil said unto him, If thou be the Son of God,
	command this stone that it be made bread.
   
	4 And Jesus answered him, saying, It is written, That man shall
	not live by bread alone, but by every word of God.
   
	   Luke 4

Let us believe every word of God.

* (footnote added on 2011/04/09) The declaration that God's creation was "very good" is in Genesis 1, while the garden of Eden, and the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil, is in Genesis 2. While the accounts are slightly different in these chapters, I believe that the "very good" declaration still applies.